EastEnders September 15th- September 21st 2012

After Bryan Kirkwood’s often up and down tenure as Executive Producer of EastEnders, I was hoping Lorraine Newman would produce and oversee episodes of greater quality. Unfortunately, the past week was consistent in being bad after the quality episode of last Friday which saw Janine’s temporary exit which allowed actress Charlie Brooks to take a six month break.

The week centred on characters which are unlikeable and who moan at their dire situations when the viewer is trying really hard to care. I really thought EastEnders would be of a better quality as we approach autumn as this is the period which traditionally sees the greatest drama and storyline culminations. The quality was so bad that I can’t motivate myself to write a lengthy piece on the week. Instead, I will do bullet points:

We had:

·         Lola’s social worker calling literally every episode which was highly unrealistic as social workers do not do this in real life!

·         Billy Mitchell’s role of the loser of the Square confirmed as Michael sacked him and left him without a job.

·         Cora Cross “getting on my wick” as Strictly’s Len Goodman would put it. She is always rude to people for no reason and now I can see why she has had an ASBO!

·         Denise and Sharon sniping at each other for no reason. I want these two to be friends, not frenemies! Why can’t Denise be given a proper storyline?! Diane Parish is fantastic but not being used to her potential which really irks me.

·         Michael fuming at Janine’s exit and her actions since (she froze the business accounts leaving him virtually penniless)

·         Phil very nearly hitting the bottle but being persuaded not to by Sharon who instead told him to fight on and run his businesses to give himself something to focus on. This saw the unpleasant Phil Mitchell to return- he was rude and arrogant when bossing Jean and Fatboy about.

·         Jack upsetting Sharon by organising a babysitter for ‘Denny’ (call him Dennis please Sharon, Denny is wearing thin!) without her permission. It all turned out ok though as Sharon and Jack made up (but not love. Yet...)

·         Max acting shifty and giving Tanya a calendar with cats on which showed their wedding day as this Christmas Eve. This aroused my suspicions as the calendar had cats on and Kat is seeing a Branning brother behind Alfie’s back...

·         Zainab being weirdly enthusiastic about Syed and Christian’s upcoming civil partnership considering she was homophobic just two years ago.

·         Syed spiralling further and further into debt as he stole £10,000 from his brother’s business in order to pay a debt. I find it hard to care about this as it has been announced that Syed and Christian will both be leaving in November. This is typical EastEnders: give characters a storyline when it has been announced that they are leaving. This has happened before with Vanessa Gold and Julie Perkins who were not used for months and only made interesting and given something to do when they were on their way out.

·         Tyler return and punch Joey after Joey mocked him for losing the Emporium.

·         Kim Fox being her usual idiotic self. Does she not do serious? Her constant ‘comedy’ is wearing thing and is losing its effectiveness.

All in all, a fairly poor week. I seriously hope the next few weeks pick up quality wise and feature characters who are written well and who are not moaning at their circumstances despite their circumstances being their own faults (Lola, Michael,  Billy).

EastEnders September 8th- September 14th 2012

This week in EastEnders has mostly been about two couples- Kat and Alfie, and Janine and Michael. The episodes throughout the week were building up to one big crescendo and this was Kat’s confession to Alfie and Janine’s paranoia and eventual exit.

This all started on Monday with Janine once again asking Billy to help her spy on Michael and report his movements to her. Janine wanted Michael watched because she didn’t trust him around other women and also because she didn’t trust him around her beloved cash. Janine also installed spyware (unsuccessfully) on his computer and tried to make Michael come home by enticing him home with various gifts throughout the day. This behaviour started to unsettle Michael who began to worry about his new wife’s state of mind. As the week ended, Janine gave Michael a briefcase with £450,000 cash inside it. She said that if he really wanted her money that much he could have it. But if he took the cash, he was to never come near her or Scarlett ever again. This infuriated Michael as he couldn’t believe that Janine still didn’t trust him after everything they had been through with baby Scarlett and her premature birth. This led to a heart-to-heart with Janine saying she just couldn’t trust him and Michael saying that initially he had been after her money, but that he had grown to love her and that the money didn’t matter to him anymore. Michael also said some nasty, spiteful things in the heat of the moment. He believed Scarlett was better off without Janine and that she could never love anyone as much as she loved her cash. This touched a nerve with Janine as she realised she was right. This was heart breaking to watch as you knew Janine was ill and needed help. She had after all, been paranoid about her husband while also looking after a baby. The strain proved too much for Janine as she insisted that Michael was right. She could never be a wife and mother and so it was best if she left the square. As Janine drove off in floods of tears it was left to Michael to whisper “but I love you” as held their baby in his arms.  So it's bye bye Janine but thankfully it's only for six months as Charlie Brooks take a break.

 

Meanwhile, the week started with Kat throwing away the key to the flat where she had been meeting her mystery lover. She clearly did this to avoid temptation and make her focus on her family. Jean later found the key and put it on the bar in case a customer had lost it. This made Kat give into temptation and meet her mystery lover once again. This time she spent the night there and woke up the next day feeling ashamed of her actions and in need of an alibi. Luckily for her, Kim agreed to give her an alibi but only after Kat told her where she had been. Did Kat tell Kim everything? Of course she didn’t. Instead she lied to her and Kim bought her story of helping an old friend called ‘Debbie’. I wonder if this is a subtle clue by the writers- D for Debbie and Derek. I’ve always believed her lover is Derek (as much as the thought repulses me). So Kat’s lies had eased Alfie’s suspicions but these suspicions were aroused again as Kat received a bouquet of flowers from her lover with a card saying he loved her. Kat hid the card and said her flowers were from her dad. Alfie knew that a father doesn’t send rose to his daughter and insisted on his wife being honest with him. Kat insisted there was no one else but later buckled and told Alfie everything apart from whom the mystery man was. A disgusted Alfie threw her out into the night but later took her back as she insisted that she wasn’t sure if she loved her mystery man but that she loved her family unit more. Alfie agreed to go away with her for a week and see if he could forgive her.

 

Yawn!

Alfie’s problem is that he forgives her every time. He finally showed some courage by throwing her out but took her back not an hour later as she turned on the water works and agreed to phone her lover in front of him and tell him that it was over for good. In my opinion Alfie needs to move on from Kat with someone else. Roxy perhaps? The reason I ponder this is because Kat cannot stay faithful to him and to be frank, Alfie deserves better than to live his life wondering if Kat has cheated on him- again.

 

In other news….

Lucy further softened towards Ian as he went for his meeting with his ‘mental health people’ (as Sharon so eloquently put it). Ian broke down and told Lucy that he was sorry for everything but would try to be there for her in future….

Alice told Derek that he had to let her live her life and stop interfering. Derek promised to stay out of her business but I can’t see this happening!

Tanya comforted a heartbroken Abi and told her that she would find someone else. Abi told Tanya that she didn’t want anyone else- she couldn’t help loving Jay despite knowing what he had done.

EastEnders September 1st- September 7th 2012

Another week in soap has passed but what has been happening?

EastEnders- The week’s BIG story

Finally! This week saw some proper kitchen sink drama in EastEnders, courtesy of an unbalanced Shirley Carter who is played to perfection by Linda Henry. Shirley’s life has unravelled ever since she discovered the horrific truth about who killed her best friend Heather. Leaving Phil and vowing to destroy him, Shirley turned to drink to numb her pain. As the week progressed we saw Shirley becoming increasingly volatile after Kat chucked her out of the Vic because she blamed her for the bed bug infestation. (The real source was Kat as it turned out her flat she shared with her mystery lover was the place from which she had spread the bugs).

Thankfully, Jean took pity on Shirley and told her that she needed to sort her life out while she still had the chance. She urged Shirley to move on as living in Walford was clearly eating away at her. This was true and the scenes were acted to perfection by Gillian Wright and Linda Henry. We even had some dark comedy as Shirley branded Jean a “nutter” and saw some real chemistry between the two. I hope this unlikely friendship is developed when Shirley returns later in the year. Back to this week, and Jean’s kindness and words of wisdom didn’t last long as Shirley turned to booze again and ended up sleeping on a bench in the square and on the floor outside the minute mart. Denise showed her some compassion and urged her to come back to the B&B with her as she really needed to pull herself together. After bumping into Jay and being urged by Patrick to forgive him, Shirley attacked him and told him that she would never forgive him for the lies he had told to protect Ben.

 

Clearly dismayed at her inability to forgive (and who can blame Shirley for that?!), Denise said that maybe Shirley should move on. Denise and Jean’s words of wisdom were both spookily accurate- Shirley had to heal away from a place that held such bad memories. Indeed, days earlier Shirley had nearly been attacked after a man wouldn’t take no for an answer. Luckily Phil punched him and sent him on his way but Shirley still didn’t want to know.

 

Indeed, Phil realised that Shirley needed her daughter’s help after she visited him and tried to make him turn to drink again. Not a good move when he’s an alcoholic, eh Shirl! Phil said that he wouldn’t turn to drink because he loved her and wanted to be there for her when she came round and forgave him. This angered Shirley and deciding that she would leave Walford, she stumbled through the square before falling into a gutter still clutching her bottle of scotch. This was what Carly first saw as she returned to the square and being unsurprisingly disgusted at her mum’s condition, she proceeded to walk straight back out of her life.

This led us to the last episode of the week and what a treat it was!

Denise pleaded with Carly to stay and hear her mum out. Phil also approached Carly and offered her cash to take her mum away from the Square. Of course we were left wondering if he wants her away from the Square because of her health or because she keeps threatening to tell the police that he was protecting Ben all along. Carly was disgusted at Phil’s offer and raged that he had taken half of her mum away. Yes, Carly did listen and stuck around long enough to have a mini heart- to –heart with her estranged mother.

 

 There was a beautiful moment when Shirley held her newborn grandson in her arms and smiled a proper genuine smile. This was so nice to see as we rarely see Shirley smile! Carly then offered her mum the chance to go and live with her until she got back on her feet so to speak. Shirley accepted and after forgiving Jay for his part in Heather’s death, warned Phil that when he least expected it, she would be back! So that is the end of Shirley for a few months at least as Linda Henry takes a well deserved break. This storyline has really brought Shirley to the forefront of the show and this can only be a good thing!

 

In Other News:

Zainab showed some compassion towards Ian and accompanied him to the doctors.

Sharon and Tanya made friends after Sharon confessed that Dennis has been murdered.

Lucy began to soften towards Ian.

EastEnders August 25th- August 31st 2012

Another week in soap has passed but what has been happening?

 

EastEnders- The week’s BIG story

After a great couple of weeks with exceptional drama from all involved, EastEnders slipped back down in quality as quickly as Kat rips off her knickers when she’s with her mystery lover. This week focused on the storyline of Kat’s affair with a mystery man. We know its Derek, Max, Jack or Michael. Personally, I think the mystery man is Derek but that’s another story.

Kat’s liaison with her mystery man was witnessed by Alfie this week and yet he didn’t guess that the mystery man was sleeping with his wife behind his back. The whole saga began with the Vic Football team being thrown out of the league because of Ray playing for two different teams. The discovery led to a mass brawl between the team and this led to glasses being smashed and chairs being thrown. As Alfie cleared up the mess, Kat tended to her lover’s injured hand in the kitchen. Alfie then walked in on them but as Kat was just cleaning the wound he thought nothing of it. After all, all he could see was his wife helping his friend. This is what is so frustrating- Alfie trusts Kat despite her track record of cheating on him.  Kat also despaired that Alfie had employed a down and out Shirley to work behind the bar along with the recently employed Fatboy. For once, Kat was right in that the Vic didn’t need any more staff. This was clearly a plot device to ensure Kat felt let down by Alfie once again.

 

Kat of course felt guilt. A bottle of her favourite perfume had been left on the bar for her. She assumed it was from her mystery man so of course arranged for him to meet up with her. After another rendezvous she felt terrible guilt when Alfie asked if she had found his gift for her. This wasn’t enough to stop the affair as Kat once again texted her lover and then slipped the phone back down her cleavage. Seriously, who hides their phone in their bra?!

The week did end with Kat being completely thrown. After the lover had had his wound tended to and left, Kat saw the words “I LOVE YOU” written in her lipstick on a bandage she had used. Kat’s face was a picture. She had been up for a bit of fun but now the trysts had turned into something more. Her lover was saying that he had fallen for her. Is he messing with her head? Or is he being genuine? I can’t wait to find out despite not liking this storyline...

 

In Other News...

Lucy was still fuming with her dad for his vanishing act and this week informed him that she was going to be letting the stall that had been in his family for generations. Ian was heartbroken but thankfully Sharon persuaded her against the idea...

 

Tanya and Sharon were brought together by Ian after he realised that Sharon needed a friend after she changed her mind and decided to stick around in Walford. He paired her up with Tanya which was amusing as they had exchanged bitchy comments just the week before when Tanya came home to find Sharon in her clothes. Their ‘friendly’ game of boxing on the wii was highly amusing as both women were determined to win. What was even more amusing was these scenes were interspersed with the brawl going on at the Vic. It was Tanya who won and Sharon who stormed off after accusing Tanya of being over competitive but only after insulting her house and saying that when she had lived there it had been much more homely. Ouch. Is this the start of a new friendship or the start of a feud? I suspect the former...

AJ returned to the Square with his bags and made straight for the Masoods’ house. Zainab’s welcome was less than welcoming and being Zainab, she interfered and called his wife who told Zainab that he had left her because he didn’t want children and not because she’d had an affair.

 

FINALLY! Walford’s most boring character ever left the Square after losing everything in a poker game with Derek. If you’re still awake I’m talking about Anthony Mon. Hopefully Tyler follows him soon...